Movie Maniacs of New York
Imagination is more important than knowledge. For knowledge is limited, whereas imagination embraces the entire world, stimulating progress, giving birth to evolution.(a)
part one
life’s work
February 13, 2022
8 15 pm location: somewhere in Brooklyn…
The front door unlocks and they push their way in out of the cold. The door slams behind them. Ben and Jordan have just come back from picking out a new kitten and they’re floating ideas for names. Dirk Diggler? Reynolds Woodcock? Philip Marlowe? They’re confidently unsure. Maybe they’ll flip a coin later on. They walk up a flight of stairs and unlock their door.
ADAM: Oh what’s up bros? Who’s this little guy here?
JORDAN: The newest maniac of the family.
ADAM: He certainly looks it. What’s his name?
JORDAN: Currently unknown.
BEN: Yeah can’t decide. So how’d it go today?
ADAM: It went well. They want to meet on Monday. Let’s grab a quick board meeting. Then I gotta head out.
The bros take their seat at a finely crafted wood table with a glass top. Underneath the glass are photographs spread across the surface. This was the same thing their mom had going for them when they were kids, changing up the photos as often as she took them. It was a very personal project that represented her life’s work in a way. Not so much the physical collection of photographs, but rather the people in them that she loved. There is a vase in the middle of the table.
BEN: Yo where’d you get this vase?
ADAM: That market from last weekend.
BEN: Nice man. Mom’s gonna love this.
He smells a lilac.
ADAM: Okay, so first things first, they want to meet next week. It’ll just be preliminary stuff but they like what is happening here and want to help.
BEN: They know we’re going to need a bigger space, right? Bigger than this.
ADAM: They do now. BEN: It’s business time. Oh!(b) ADAM: Yeah so we’ll run through the details on Monday. But things are looking pretty good.
Fists go around the table like clockwork.
Next up, I spoke to mom today and she’s taking the C & J all the way at 9am. So one of us has to go meet her at 3pm on 32nd because I have that thing at Columbus Circle then.
JORDAN: Yeah I can do it. We’re all good for the concert too?
Somehow he snagged four incredible seats to Neil Young on Saturday. This happened to also be their mom’s fake birthday, and a story for another time.
BEN: How the hell did you get those anyways?
JORDAN: I’ll never tell.© ADAM: Well played. Regular Thai spot for dinner, 630?
BEN: Hell yeah.
ADAM: Oh and mom also might need subway directions on Sunday she is meeting Charlotte for yoga and might not remember how to get there in Harlem.
BEN: Making a note right now.
ADAM: By the way did you guys see that spot mom posted on her stories the other day. She wants to check out some building near the World Trade and then get dinner afterwards. Tuesday or Wednesday.
JORDAN: Tuesday might be tough. Let’s talk to mom this weekend.
ADAM: Cool. Last thing on the docket then is tomorrow evening. Movies and pizza at the regular times and that’s basically it. Ben I have you down for tidying the next day. Fresh sheets and towels in the spare bedroom for mom.
BEN: Copy that, no problem.
The kitten stretches its little paws up the side of the vase losing its balance and tumbling over. He looks up at Adam.
ADAM: So this guy needs a name then right? How about john wick?
BEN: Nice one. Jord? JORDAN: Maybe flip flip.
Adam pulls out a quarter and tosses it into the air but before it lands Ben is pacing around the room.
BEN: Okay, so So yeah, maybe we, what if we just all voted…
ADAM: Ok sure. Let’s do it now.
BEN: I mean what if EVERYONE voted…
The bros shift over to the little fur ball that can barely walk when all the sudden…
KITTEN: Meow!
ADAM: There’s one in favor.
BEN: I don’t know why we didn’t think of it earlier. We already vote on everything.
ADAM: True. It’s pretty big though.
JORDAN: True. Maybe the biggest.
BEN: True. But a lot easier this way.
ADAM: Ok then. All in favor of going full maniac for this one?
Three fists pull toward the center and explode.
ADAM: Unanimous! How about a week of submissions before polls. Sound good?
BEN: Sound very good.
JORDAN: Purrrrfect.
Jordan reaches over and scoops the little kitten into his hands raising him high into the sky for all to see.(d) Good luck little buddy he thought to himself.
Ending from Jordans POV looking into the kittens eyes. As the kitty closeup gets closer and closer we can see other cats on the table coming into focus.
Old man look at my life, I’m a lot like you were…(e) Fade to black. Pigeon, winged cloak of gray, in the cities hellish maw, one glance and you fly away. Your Grace holds me in awe.(f)
part two
double feature
February 14, 2022
7 30 pm location: same somewhere in Brooklyn…
The clubhouse walls in the main room are covered with posters and many subtitled with scenes from favorite films. This is where the maniacs gather every 2nd Friday of every month for a double feature and pizza from @EverybodyEats a non-profit in Williamsburg serving free pizza from 11–9 year round. Besides the screening room dance hall there’s an editing bay, a recording room, an art gallery doubling as a ping pong dojo, and a rounder’s room for later in the evening. Silver Linings Playbook just finished up and True Romance won the main event. About an hour till showtime…
I smell pizza.
MONIQUE: Yo Ben. What’s up?
BEN: Hey Monique. Bon appetite!
Three slices of fuel for Riz painting on stage.
BEN: Yo dinner is served.
RIZ: Thank you. Thank you.
BEN: You’re welcome man. New vision from the ether?
RIZ: That’s exactly what this is.
CAITLIN: Hey, Ben. We just met the coolest little bookshelf. Oh my god.
kitten
and that
BEN: Yeah Jordan’s been working on it with Ariele for a few months. I heard they might start extending into the main room soon. Not sure though. I just bring home the books.
CAITLIN: We brought you guys a new one today. I gave it to Adam.
BEN: Awesome. That last book you sent us was great. Really blew a hole in my brain(g). The idea that love is a shared dream.(h) Sound like something a kid could understand. By the way where’s Elijah at? CAITLIN: Oh he’s in the office with your brothers and the kitten. He wants to name him Sammy.
BEN: Of course he does. CAITLIN: He also wants to play you in ping pong.
BEN: Well, game on then. But first we gotta feed the DJ…
Across the room there’s a temporary dance floor and a projector moving images around to the sound of DJRoew. The screen dis-playing Tom Cruise and Jamie Foxx in a taxi cab.(i) Above the booth hangs a ticking timer with a sign below that reads: I HACK TIME.(j) The adjacent wall is a colorless ode to Hitchcock by Belin.
BEN: Need anything more man?
REOW: Ne acui.
All right off to the office…
WAYNE: Oh hey man. How you doing?
BEN: Yo Wayne. What’s up Wayne?
WAYNE: Oh nothing man. Just saw your mom’s family photography. One of a kind ain’t it? I think so…
WAYNE: Hey what’s the story behind this pizza again? It’s delicious…
WAYNE: By the way, you comin’ next week? At the bowery ballroom… WAYNE: Wow. That a bob kessel over there? I love Superman…
WAYNE: What’s the deal with the poker game? I could eat…
Like a wandering dream until you get to where WHAT EXACTLY DO YOU DO HERE?(k) is written on the door of the office space. Inside it on a Lam Kat designed wall in large lettering is: You cannot force an agenda, you must inspire one!(l) A group of people are clawing around the kitten who is crawling around on Jordans shoulder. They’re all standing by the edge of the bookshelf where the DVD collection is. A ladder stands nearby to reach the VHSs in the way way back.
BEN: Happy belated birthday man! How old are you now? ELIJAH: Six.
BEN: Okay. Six high fives then. You ready?
123456!
BEN: Want to play ping pong?
ELIJAH: I want to see john wick five. Jordan laughs. Adam agrees.
ADAM: The cinematography and locations are amazing.
HENRY: The music is always so rhythmic with the gunshots.
JORDAN: John wick, he’s so hot right now.(m) MAX: I liked number two the best because of common, the rapper. HANNAH: But what about the original? It was so personal.
ADAM TWO: John wick or the punisher?
JORDAN: Batman or superman?
ELIJAH: Batman!
Interesting…
He’s younger…
More flexible…
Flexible?
Checks watch…
Popcorn is popping…
30 minutes till movie time…
Elijah how about that game now…
BEN: Yo what’s the package over here?
JORDAN: I think it’s a piece of art from Costa Rica.
BEN: Oh, all right.
JORDAN: Hey this is Henry by the way, the recording artist I told you about. He’s ready for Patreon. Oh I just told Jaeji we would help with her next music video too.
Ben: Cool. Have you seen Kay by the way?
Hey Jess half an hour till seats…
Please let me keep this memory… Just this one…(n) DJ Reow hands over the mic… Hello fellow maniacs…
Fade to black. I apologize for my appearance. I hope I might be employed here by you as something. A monster for the children to play with perhaps?(o)
part three
glitch in matrix July 4, 2022 4 30 pm location: still same somewhere in Brooklyn…
Hello fellow maniacs, artists, entrepreneurs, filmmakers, actors, editors, directors, writers, cinematographers, photographers, sound designers, mixers, costume and makeup, musicians, vocalists, illustrators, muralists, painters, dancers, sculptors, New Yorkers, Americanos, human beans and aliens — if you’re tuning in today please hurry…
Anyway welcome back to the show, I think therefore I am your co host Ben Schopick aka Funpov and to my right as always is mr. Jordan Schopick aka Lil’ Scho. Jord you wanna say a little something to all the crazy maniacs out there in the world:
He strums his guitar.
BEN: As you may know or not today is our 200 th episode so we invited one of our most honorable guests. A dear friend and host of the @BingersAnonymous podcast. Fellow New Yorker, ballplayer, and recently now a filmmaker. Si, Senor?
ANDRES: When you watch movies, you just want to make them. You know? BEN: Couldn’t have said it better myself.
ANDRES: I stole it actually. Shout out to Mr. Marty Scorsays!
BEN: Ladies and gentleman, Andres Ruiz!
ANDRES: Thank you buddies!
BEN: Jordan, you remember when you first met this maniac?
JORDAN: First reformed. Angelika theater.
ANDRES: That’s right buddies. What an incredible film!
BEN: Even a pastor needs a paster.(g) JORDAN: Shout out to Paul Schrader.
ANDRES: Long live A-2–4!
BEN: Long live Reverend Toller!
ANDRES: Buddies, the movie theater’s my church! Andres gets up and let’s out a yell.
ANDRES: Favorite of 2018?
JORDAN: Phantom thread.
ANDRES: Is it close?
JORDAN: It’s possible.
BEN: We have one of those Woodcock scenes on file yeah? The dinner scene…
Clicks around until audio clip plays… What precisely is the nature of my game?
BEN: Shout out to our production assistant, Jess. We’d be lost without you.
JORDAN: Thanks Jess.
ANDRES: Yeah Jess!
A smile’s seen in the editing room.
BEN: So buddy, tell us about your first film.
ANDRES: So ya, written by my dad and I, c0-directed by my buddy Marco and edited might I say effortlessly, by this maniac right here. JORDAN: Thank you, thank you.
BEN: Shot entirely on iphone, is that right?
ANDRES: That’s right, buddy.
JORDAN: Shouts out to Soderbergh.
ANDRES: Soderbergh Day was amazing!
JORDAN: You can never go wrong with a movie marathon.
Ben plays a classic clip: To me the great hope is that now that these little 8mm video recorder and stuff now, some–just people who normally wouldn’t make movies are going to be making them. And, you know, suddenly one day some little fat girl in Ohio is going to be the new Mozart, and you know, and make a beautiful film with her father’s little camera-corder and for once this whole professionalism about movies will be destroyed forever and it will become an art form. That’s my opinion.(p) ANDRES: That’s it buddy! That’s the revolution!
BEN: Quick shout to our cousins in Ohio who were just here for the Cloud Atlas episode. You were saying…
ANDRES: Shouts to Lebron! Yeah so the film is set in Colombia where we’re from and it’s about family like all stories are at their core.
BEN: Nice buddy. What do you mean by that?
ANDRES: I just mean that a story can either be about family or a lack of family. It all starts somewhere, you know? But I have to stop real quick and send a massive shout out to the maniacs for choosing this film and covering the festival fees. You are all my buddies now. I want to go watch movies with all of you. I’ll never forget this.
BEN: Buddy thank you for making this film.
ANDRES: Thank you buddies.
BEN: I think one of the reasons we became because of our meditations on family. Could bit about what family means to you.
such good buddies is you just talk a little
ANDRES: Ok so basically it’s like this — let’s say you need help moving a body one day. It could happen, you know? So you’d go to your family for help, right? and they would say where to. That’s it.
The guitar darkens its chords. Ben plays an opening clip: Family what
counts. Family what it’s all about. Family will always be there.(g)
Jord raises it up: I’ll dig a f**king hole. Where are the shovels?(r)
Ben re-raises:
I need for us to be a family. I cannot do this if we
are
not.(t)
Jord
moves
all
in:
Do
you
know
why
I
am
respected?
Because I am capable of anything for my family and my clan.(q)
BEN: I heard it once said that these people hold the key to who you are. Shout out to Uncle Sam and all the Art Houses of New England.
ANDRES: Buddy. Family. Is. Everything.
By the way if you see any scenes about family this week, you can drop a voice memo to our burner at 347–944–3843 and if the ideas are new we’ll feature you…
BEN: Speaking of next week legendary film editor David Tedeschi is stopping by to talk about the art of the cut, and what it’s like working with Fran Lebowitz on their upcoming 4 th installment.
JORDAN: Gonna give them all a rewatch this weekend if anyone wants that extra credit… BEN: As you know already or not credits can be cashed in for all types of time here. We got air time, studio time, stage time, lunch time, dinner time, snack time, hang time you name it we got it. We even raffle off some times too so stay tuned…
JORDAN: Andres you going to Metrograph this week?
ANDRES: How did you know buddy? Thursday.
JORDAN: I could do Thursday.
BEN: Matinee?
ANDRES: Are you down?
JORDAN: I’ll shoot Adam a textoo. He’s usually down for Metro.
ANDRES: Nice. I haven’t seen Adam in a minute. How’s he doing?
JORDAN: He’s well. Learning everything there is to know about real estate right now. He gets up way earlier than we do grinds all day and then somehow has time for the family biz.
ANDRES: That’s how it’s done! By the way I finally started following your mom on the gram and I gotta say I’m impressed. How’s she shop her photos like that?
BEN: Yeah she’s nice on there. She’ll be here in a couple weeks. She can teach you then no problem. Shout out to @gailsailswithwhale See you soon ma!
……….
THE CONVERSESSION CONTINUES ON:
20:24 UN PROPOSITO FAMILIAR
22:04 THE MEYEROWITZ STORIES
24:45 THE SQUID AND THE WHALE
26:03 FRANCIS & NOAH & GRETA
29:55 SUCCESSION SEASON FOUR
34:45 EVERYBODY HAS A GAME (F)
35:56 FRIENDS CLOSE/FAMILY CLOSER
36:33 SAM ESMAIL CORPORATION, LLC
37:55 THE LAST WALZ & THE BAND
39:55 EMBRACE THE SERPENT
39:59 Y TU MAMA TAMBIEN& CUARON
39:54 & DEL TORO & INARRITU
39:55 BIRDMAN OR THE UNEXPECTED VIRTUE
OF IGNORANCE
39:66 I AM NOT YOUR NEGRO
37:33 & THE REAL SUPERHEROES
34.55 L.L. PHILIP SEYMOUR HOFFMAN 37:54 THE MANIAC WALL OF FRAMES
40:45 LAST WEEK HW ASSIGNMENT
41:00 SPECTRUM OF PERSPECTIVES
42:34 MOVIE MEMORY:ENTER THE VOID
47:54 PSYCHOLOGY OF A SCENE
47:55 WRITTEN & EDITED BY
48:66 NEW YORK CINEMATICS
48:45 STATUE OF LIB. STORY
48:44 ELARA & SAFDIE INSPO
48:77 AMERICAN VS. FRENCH
49:32 NETFLIX VS. AMAZON
55:55 NETFLIX VS. HOLLYWOOD
63:55 FILMMAKERS USING PODCASTS
76:34 BLUE CHIPS STARRING NICK NOLTE
82:55 SPACE JAM STARRING MICHAEL JORDAN
86:55 HIGH FLYING BIRD STARRING ANDRES HOLLAND
……..
Don’t let them fool you all your life, fella. You were born for way
more than this. Don’t let them fool you.(b)
ANDRES: Love that line buddy!
BEN: So many lines. Shout out to Ray Ray Burke.
ANDRES: And to Spence! Buddy, you remember the Hoboken courts?
BEN: Of course buddy. All day with the spinner fade.
ANDRES: Oh I still got it! Every Tuesday 8pm. Come!
BEN: Can we start that 2–2 tourney this summer?
ANDRES: Only if Billy Hoyle and Sidney Deane can host it!
BEN: Jess can you
She’s already drafting a proposal…
JORDAN: What ever happened to Wesley anyway?
ANDRES: He was once #1 in the world no?
JORDAN: US marshals was great.
ANDRES: And then there was Blade, buddy!
JORDAN: I didn’t realize he’d done so many NY films. King of New York, Sugar Hill, Money Train, New Jack City, Brooklyn’s Finest. All from the 90s. BEN: Shout out to the 90s. Eternal.
ANDRES: Buddy you membah living in the LES?
BEN: Oh I membah. I borrowed books from your library Jord, membah?
JORDAN: Oh I membah. Finally got that bookshelf we wanted.
BEN: Hell yeah. This is when movie pass dropped to $10 a month…
ANDRES: Something like 3 million of us in the first 6 months…
BEN: The same time Lincoln Plaza AND Sunshine Cinemas shut down…
JORDAN: church…
Architecture
on
Sunshine
was
beautiful.
Originally
a
ANDRES: Wait buddy. Was this when the maniacs were born…
BEN: That’s right buddy. Where it all began…
A tiny glitch outside the bricks, A piney pitch inside your mind. And if you follow thru like Alice, A rabbit leads you to your time.
He opens a drawer and grabs a container labeled top secret, and spreads it across the table. The three lean in and a light beams onto what appears to be a map. It looks alive…
ANDRES: Buddies, this is the piece you’ve been working on? Yo the whole timeline’s on here! Look at the young maniacs right here. When we were just a group chat!
BEN: You remember our first studio?
JORDAN: The crawl space you mean? We made it work.
BEN: Everything we’ve done has led us on this path to where we are right now. Every single thing in your life has happened for a specific reason. All the scenes in your mind merely checkpoints that paint a broader picture. In this case here it’s movie pass, it’s these iconic New York theaters falling. It’s the group chat, the podcast, the screenings around town, the crawl space. There’s Jess right there, and the festival fees right here. This amazing clubhouse upgrade! Pretty soon it’s the app. One day it’ll be the workshop and another day our first film festival. But eventually my good maniacs, all roads must lead home…
He reaches over and puts his finger down at the end of the map…
JORDAN: X marks the movie theater… BEN: I want you to close your eyes and imagine that you’re walking to your local theater now. It’s a beautiful summer afternoon like today. You get there. You walk in. You swipe for ticket stubs. The popcorn is popping and it’s free so you grab a bucket for your buddies. Maybe you’re early so you hit the arcade with the kids. Or head straight to the door and the choice is yours — anywhere you want to sit. You sit down and talk movies. Then the trailers begin. Some are good and some are so bad but who cares because there are no more crumby commercials!(w) Just like it used to be. Just like this podcast is. By the way you don’t have to turn your cell phone off in here because the theater does it for you. Pretty nice right? They call it maniac mode. Don’t worry though the halls have service so do your thing. But the theater is filling up so make it quick. And if there are any empty seats they’re given to the streets. No seat left behind they call it. You’re here. You’re breathing. You’re totally in the pleasant moment as they say. Completely with your buddies and your family in a room full of neighbors. You’re all looking at a giant screen before you. Everyone’s eyes and ears are the same. For the next two hours you will laugh and cry and touch the sky. This is not the place you come to escape life. But to experience it! Did I mention your seat is quite comfortable? The movie begins…
ANDRES: What movie buddy?
BEN: Pick a movie any movie.
ANDRES: Everybody Wants Some? Cool with you buddy?
JORDAN: Ohh yeah.
BEN: OK so, the movie is great, grand, wonderful(x) thanks to Mr. Now and Later. You leave the theater talking about it. Fast forward now to next morning. You wake up you brush your teeth you drink coffee and eat your wheaties. While you do so your movie maniac app is open because you’re ready to rate. You’ve been pondering every since you went to sleep and the moment you woke up the images and sounds have still stuck around in your head. The sign of a good movie. So you click on multiple categories: Writing 1–10 Directing 1–10 Editing 110 Acting 1–10 Lighting 1–10 Sound 1–10 Music 1–10 Costumes 1–10 Set Design 1–10. You also add it to your TOP 250 if it’s deserving. Next you thumb over to the calendar to see what’s playing and what’s coming out both new and old. You vote on what you want to see come to your local theater. Everyone in your neighborhood does the same. The kids love this game. Because this is what makes it theirs…
ANDRES: Buddy… This is our Territory!
JORDAN: And our Utopia…
BEN: Really think about it for a second right. A movie theater that runs itself. The very first of its kind. Without outside influence. Utilizing the greatest tech in human history. A voting machine for the future. What else would we use the internet for? Everyone has a voice now. To see what you want to see. Build what you want to build. And that church you were talking about, buddy? It’s a dream we can all share in. With seats we can all sit in. A home to call our very own. And we can create it finally. One little maniac at a time. I rest my monologue. Jordan please save us.
He clears his throat and puts a hand over his heart…
JORDAN: We hold these truths to be self-evident, that all maniacs are created equal, that they are endowed by their *creators* with certain unalienable rights, that among these are Life, Liberty and the pursuit of Cinema…
He takes his hand off his chest and touches a button…
It’s coming from the sorrow in the street The holy places where the races meet From the homicidal bitchin’ That goes down in every kitchen To determine who will serve and who will eat From the wells of disappointment Where the women kneel to pray For the grace of God in the desert here And the desert far away:
Democracy is coming to the USA (y)
When the clip finishes Andres puts his head in his hands and starts to cry. Jess enters with a box of tissues moments later.
BEN: We’re all here for you buddy. Even Jess. Though she may not be ready to bury bodies with you just yet.
ANDRES: I’d bury a body for you Jess!
BEN: Yeah Jess, me too!
JORDAN: Where are the shovels Jess!
Sniffling and laughing…
ANDRES: I love you buddies. America you too baby! Happy b-day!
BEN: To an Unconditional Support of Artists! USA, USA, USA,
All chanting and pounding on table…
BEN: Shout out to America. And New York City the creative capital of the world. Shout out to all our favorite pods in Bk and beyond. Bingers Anonymous of course and Chapo Trap House the original phenomenon. To Very Ape, Wait but why, Nerdwriter1 and New York’s Got Talent the #1 talent show of all time. Also
Brainpickings and Chronic
Flowers
also
and
the
as
well as
and
TeenageCrimeRadio
on Soundcloud. Plus
all the
out there getting after it. Shout out to
ArtBNB
coming
soon
to
an
empty
bedroom
near
you.
And
long
live
Criterion Collection
and the Public
Kanopy Library
also @Karlinqueens
my first acting coach. Shouts to Tudor Max Danny Eddie Aaron Swartz and the rest of the 3000 plus per day. Plus Matthew Silver and Aaron Berger $1ices. But finally finally shout to all of our relatives near and far you know exactly who you are (some of the original maniacs right here (*extfamshout*). And very lastly my two bros Jordan and Adam. Absolutely nothing happens without you. I don’t know much, but I know that.(z)
When the siblings unite, The games can begin… Until death do us part, Together we win…
BEN: All right that’s it for me. Jord you going to shout city today?
JORDAN: Just a quick one out to Itai and Dorit and the whole fam in Israel. We look forward to seeing you in the clubhouse next month and discussing the cinema scene in Tel Aviv.
Says a little something in Hebrew followed by a quick guitar solo…
BEN: Hell yeah thank you Jimi I mean Jordan. Andres buddy you ready for the floor? The mic is yours…
He closes his eyes and takes an exaggerated breath. One more and before you know it he’s out of his seat and pacing around shouting out all the people he loves and all the movies he wants to see plus the Miami Heat’s starting five and then deep into their bench. He takes his shirt off and beats on his chest… Is this some sort of radical new therapy, Dr. Marvin?(j) Everyone in the building is listening and laughing bec they’ve seen this before. 15mins later…
ANDRES: And to my buddies! I’m dead serious when I say that if it wasn’t for you I would have never made a movie. To you the scho-bros!
BEN: The pleasure’s all ours buddy…
Around, around, the pounds go around…
AND THAT’S OUR SHOW FOLKS…
HAVE FUN AND BE SAFE TONIGHT…
REMEMBER TO REMEMBER THE HOMEWORK…
RECORD VOICE MEMOS AND SEND IT… MR. BURNS’ BEEN BUSY LATELY…
SO KEEP’EM COMING…
AND COME BY TO SAY HI(?)… ESPECIALLY THE YOUNG MANIACS(?)… WE’LL HELP YOU MAKE A MOVIE(?)… YOU ARE NOT SPECIAL(?)…
BUT YOU ARE UNIQUE(G)…
SO UNTIL NEXT TIME…
CYA AT THE CINEMA…
FADE TO BLACK. Focus on something in your mind. You feel it in your heart. You commit to it. Bang! it becomes true… For once in our lives man, we’re winning.(A)
part four
memory lane November 18, 2022 4 25 pm location: somewhere in Connecticut…
The bros are driving home for Thanksgiving break. They are excited to see the house with its new exterior siding. Adam’s especially excited to see the basement. This home renovation was the beginning of their family’s incorporation, and it changed everything for the better. As Adam got the initial ball rolling with mom, Ben and Jordan began developing a long term plan for themselves in New York. These last few years they’d accomplished a great deal, and for the very first time in their lives, they were making their way in the world together…
BEN: Hey so mom told me recently about the first pictures she ever took. On an an 8 th grade field trip to the Radio City Music Hall. And I was thinking what a scene that must’ve been…
ADAM: Her first time in New York City?
BEN: I believe so.
JORDAN: What kind of camera?
BEN: Polaroid.
JORDAN: Classic.
ADAM: Definitely a scene right there.
JORDAN: Opening scene possibly?
BEN: That’s what I was thinking.
ADAM: Well, what about her fake birthday?
BEN: Oh right.
JORDAN: So where’s this put us?
ADAM: Somewhere in Bridgeport?
JORDAN: Whiskey Hill?
BEN: I think that was later on.
ADAM: Do we know how Bud and Bev first met? JORDAN: Nope.
BEN: Me neither.
ADAM: Maybe it was a fiddling competition.
BEN: I’d believe it.
JORDAN: OK what do we actually know?
BEN: That they got preggers!
ADAM: That we know.
JORDAN: OK. And den?(B) BEN: Congratulations!
ADAM: Hold your horses bro.
JORDAN: Yeah they’re not married yet.
BEN: Sheeeeeeeeeeeeet.© JORDAN: That must’ve been crazy…
BEN: Yeah it was crazy…
JORDAN: What do you mean, was?
BEN: I mean it was the craziest moment of my life. What?
ADAM: You have lost your marbles bro.
JORDAN: Yeah yeah, what planet are you from?(D) BEN: You! Why are you calling me bro?
JORDAN: Yo. He OK?
ADAM: Should I pull over?
BEN: You just called me he! He he!
ADAM: When you get like this you just gotta breathe it out remember? and it’ll pass.
BEN: I agree with your brothers. Just breathe it out…
ADAM: This is crazy I give up.
BEN: No, no you’re right. What a crazy beautiful blessing this is! Just breathe it in and we’ll think our way out…
In… and out… In… and out…
BEV: That’s it. Just breathe it in… And breathe it out…
BUD: Wow you’re right. I feel much better now. All right let’s think this thing through. What would JC do?
BEV: Honey bun I don’t think Jesus can help us here…
BUD: Honey bee. I’m talking about Johnny Cash.
BEV: Oh of course! Are you sure we can’t just be honest about all this?
BUD: Do you want my parents to kill me?
BEV: Oh of course not!
BUD: Because my parents will do just that if they find out about this.
BEV: Oh Jesus. I forgot about those Irish Catholics…
BUD: You’re right though. Let’s just think it through. What would Johnny do? What would Johnny do?
Grandpa Bud gets up and gently sets the needle on Folsom Prison Blues it starts to play. By the end of the first song he sits back down next to Grammy Bev…
BUD: Beverly Loraine Stevens, I do love ya ever so much. Would you do me the honor of having me as a husband?
BEV: Oh why honey bun you… I… I…
Grammy Bev is so overwhelmed with joy she starts to cry…
BEV: I definitely do!
BUD: Well hot dang! All righty then!
BEV: Oh Bud, this is so exciting!
BUD: Hold on there bee, we gotta figure this out now…
BEV: Right right. So we’ll have to have the wedding ASAP skip town for a while. Any idea where to?
BUD: I did see an ad in the paper for flight school in reserves. Out in Texas…
and then
the
army BEV: Now wouldn’t that be warm! You’d be such a stellar pilot too! BUD: You think so?
BEV: I know so!
BUD: Well all right then. Tomorrow I’ll head over and see what’s what.
BEV: Oh Buddly, what an adventure lying ahead!
The next day Grandpa Bud enlists in the army and a month later they have a big, beautiful wedding. Soon thereafter, they would ship out onto their new adventure. Fast forward 6 months to November 19 th 1954 in San Marcos, Texas, when a little baby Gail would set sail…
BEV: Oh it’s a miracle! Just look at her. She’s so healthy!
BUD: She is a miracle. But can we run through the story again?
BEV: It’s gonna be OK Bud. It’s just a simple little story really. BUD: I know I know but I just don’t want to slip up when we get home. I want you and little Baby Gail safe and sound. So let’s run through it all one more time and maybe the night terrors will stop.
BEV: OK so only 6 more months of training left here, therefore when we get home we’ll tell everyone that Gail’s 3 months instead of 6. We also have to get a new birth certificate for her.
BUD: Gosh darnit we’re screwed! How the hell we do that?
BEV: Well what about your service buddy in the medical brigade?
BUD: Who? Dan?
BEV: Yeah. He’ll do just fine.
BUD: How the heck do I even ask for such a favor. Do I take him out for steak dinner first?
BEV: You don’t have to bribe him honey bun. He’s administration. He’s probably done this thing before.
BUD: OK. Well maybe you could ask him then.
BEV: It’ll be fine Bud he’s your buddy. I’ll tell you what to say and we’ll figure it out. Gosh isn’t she just so beautiful? Our very first child…
BUD: She’s certainly is a beaut. BEV: That’s the spirit honey bun.
BUD: OK then. You’re sure this’ll work?
BEV: I don’t like lying any more than you bud but it won’t be for too long. Just a little while. Besides February is a nicer month to celebrate a birthday anyway. After all the holiday hustle and bustle, right before the spring equinox. She’ll be a pisces now too instead of one of those ugly little scorpions running around here. So gross!
BUD: All right then. If you’re sure then I’m sure. Honey bee how’s a guy like me get so lucky in life, do you think?
BEN: Oh Buddly I’m so proud of you. You’re gonna be a excellent pilot and a wonderful father. We’ll work it all out you’ll see. Teamwork really does make the dreamwork!
………………..
Narrator…
And just like that…
Their fate was sealed…
And no one was the wiser… Not even little baby Gail… For another 58 years… Until one day…
The truth…
Would appear…
Out of nowhere…
And set her free…
Opening title cards:
The Greatest Life Ever Told
a SCHOBROS production ………
As the day around them turns to dusk Adam flips on the headlights and the road is illuminated again. I have reflected many times upon our rigid search. It has shown me that everything is illuminated in the light of the past. It is always along the side of us, on the inside, looking out. Like you say, inside out. In this way, I will always be along the side of your life. And you will always be along the side of mine…(E) The bros cruise off into the fading sunset with the soft sounds of Peter Gabriel playing when finally he wakes up…
BEN: Damn did I pass out? I just had the craziest dream. ADAM: We know bro. You can go back to sleep now.
JORDAN: Yeah yeah. Go back to sleep Buddly.
Fade to black sky. Now more than ever we need to talk to each other, to listen to each other and understand how we see the world, and cinema is the best medium for doing this.(F)
part five
posterity February 6, 2023 3 30 pm location: somewhere in Costa Rica…
Ring, ring, ring!
Hola?
No caller ID landline.
BEN: Hey dad, whats up?
DAD: Ben? Ben! How are you my son? Audrey it’s Ben!
Audrey’s hello is heard in the distance.
DAD: It’s nice to hear from you. How is New York and your brothers? BEN: Good, good, everyone’s good. You too?
DAD: Excellent. We just had lunch. Frijoles y huevos y platanos.
BEN: Muy bien. How’s Lily and Mr. Ziggums?
DAD: Muy bien muchacho. How is _________?
BEN: He’s great. 6 months old now. Getting big.
DAD: I can remember Ziggy at that age. They grow up so fast. Is that Bob in the background?
BEN: Oh yeah. It’s Marley Day over here. A couple of kids are watching the documentary.
Ben closes the door to the office.
BEN: Better?
DAD: Muchas gracias muchacho.
BEN: No de nada. Ya so I’m just calling today because tomorrow slammed for us. So, happy 68 th birthday!
is
DAD: Muchas gracias mi hijo. By the way these guest rooms are all ready whenever. I know you guys are busy though so we understand. BEN: Yeah maybe in April. Or May. Not sure yet. DAD: Fyi Audrey’s daughters are coming at the end of March. Joel and Houda are the beginning of April. Phil and Carrol April 12–19. Danny and Laurie 17–24. And maybe Krulee and Larry at the end of the month. BEN: How is Larry? Our ping pong table awaits his return.
DAD: He’s good. He needs the beach. We all need beach in the winter. BEN: It’s not too bad this winter. Warmer than last. Beach eventually though.
DAD: Plenty of room here so no worries. If it ever gets crowded there’s lots of AirBNB options here. Even some ArtBNB rooms popping up too.
BEN: That’s awesome. By the way we finally found a spot for Alfonzo. Have you seen him lately?
DAD: Yeah he’s at the beach painting most days. He says his favorito thing in la vita is to meet las artistas. So we told him about the maniacs and the Scho-bros and Funpov as well. Te gustas la youtube. He said he’ll be watching and commenting ahora.
BEN: Nice. Yeah season 7 just made it onto the schedule too. We’ll be back on the street this summer.
DAD: Excellente. We’ll look forward to it. We have the TV all hooked up finally. Have all the networks. All the access. No hay problema. BEN: You guys been watching anything lately?
DAD: The new season of Mrs. Maisel. Superb.
BEN: Haven’t had the chance yet. Shout out to Abe.
Ben presses a button… She’s a comedian. They families. That’s what they do.
DAD: Season 2?
humiliate
their
BEN: Ding-ding-ding DAD: By the way I sent an article around about a Broadway show in August. The one about the rapper that died from fentanyl a few years ago. You know it?
BEN: Life is Beautiful. The Lil Peep musical.
DAD: That’s it. Apparently it’s more of a karaoke with subtitled lyrics. We’re looking forward to it. The Brodheims might come too. Matt and Emily waiting to hear back from Dahlia about babysitting. BEN: OK.
calendar.
Shoot
me
an
when
you
know
so
I
can
put
it
on
the
DAD: Great. You think your bros will want to go?
BEN: I’ll bring it up at the next board meeting.
DAD: Excellent. Hey so I’ve got another idea for a cartoon. You want to start recording?
Ben presses another button and voila…
ROBOT: This. Phone. Call. Is. Now. Being. Recorded.
DAD: Ben, you there?
BEN: Testing testing 123, ideas reigning down me…
DAD: Ok so Bernie is on wall street dressed as a matador in the classical red and gold garment. He’s holding up the bull’s bronze cahones in one hand and a hacksaw in the other. His hat reads EL PRESIDENTE and the headline is about economic reform. Thoughts?
BEN: Hm. Will think on it. Plenty to work with there. Nice visual. DAD: It came to me in a dream last week. Was thinking something like, WALL STREET FINALLY FEELS THE BERN.
BEN: Nice one. Bullfighting the billionaire class. I like it. I’ll send it over to Mike.
Mike Marlin is a New England based artist who runs @crowdfunnies a crowd-creation page for cartoons which recently picked up stream on Reddit. The last piece Dave and Mike did was an homage to Grandma Sonya with a famous quote: You need to give people a reason for being!(b) Ben wants to do another quote next: For posterity!(b) DAD: It’s a good scrabble word.
BEN: I had to google it…
All future generations it said. The bigger picture perspective. What did she mean by it you think? That everything we did was done for them? Clearing the way for the new world of kids? Maybe Grandpa Lou could comment on this idea in a future cartoon.
DAD: So Buddy and his wife are thinking about moving here again. I’ve been emailing them pictures and local listings around our barrio. Wouldn’t that be el ultima pura vita!
BEN: So you’re sayin there’s a chance?(G) DAD: Yeah he mentioned last time we talked that Gail was helping out at The Kindness School too. That’s in the forestry center?
BEN: Yeah. She plays with the kids and takes some photos for their page. It’s a great project.
DAD: This one’s on Patreon too?
BEN: Yeah. Lots of our local non-profs playing the subscription game now too. Like 3S, the public library, the Music hall. Smaller ops also like Mr. Money Mattson and The Kat’s Meow. And the Cancer Appreciation Network as well for sharing stories about what cancer really is and where it comes from. They call it CAN.
DAD: Sounds interesting. They’re on instagram as well?
BEN: Sure. A friend of mom’s started it as a blog a couple years ago and now they do podcasting and juicing events downtown.
DAD: Oh nice. I’ll tell Larry to follow. He loves juice.
BEN: Larry loves juice?
DAD: Who doesn’t. Coconut and pineapple? What other projects you working on?
BEN: Mostly indie artists and non-profits in New York now. We do subscription strategy and publication. Management sometimes but not often. Same game as the maniacs.
DAD: I see.
BEN: Do you see?(H) DAD: Oh I see-dee-dee!
BEN:
When
Spotify
entered
the
podcast
market
in
back
in
2019
the
shift
began.
Author
of
the
book
Subscribed
talked
about
how
all
companies will become subscription based over the next 10 years. More
effective financial
accounting and better relationships with users.
Non-profits and artists are the first flexible adopters. I posted the
article a few months back. Did you see?
DAD: Maybe I missed. What
publication? BEN: Our source was the New York Times.(K) ……..
THEY CALLABORATE FOR ANOTHER 30 MINS: 15:24 A DIGITAL GOLD RUSH 17:45 CHAPO TRAP HOUSE INSPO 19:55 PATREON’S RECENT I.P.O.
23:54 INNERVIEW WITH JOE BOWER 26:34 SUBSCRIPTION CAPITALISM 34:32 UP & COMING HEALTHCARE BILL 37:55 BIG PHARMA’S ONE LAST ROAR 41:66 TELEHEALTH VS. TELEMEDICINE 43:77 PSYCHEDELIC KNOWLEDGE THERAPY 45:04 MOM’S NEXT EXHIBIT: FAMILY FITNESS 46:34 DAVID SCHOPICK’S HISTORY OF THE UNITED STATES
……..
BEN: OK so we’ll do a test run on @DavesHistoryChannel when I make it out there. We can set you up a recording room.
DAD: That would be excellent.
BEN: 10–30 minute eps. I’d give a listen.
DAD: For posterity?
BEN: So you see now?
DAD: I can see clearly now, the rain is gone!
BEN: And. Scene.
DAD: Hey does Gail have any more of those calendars by the way? We tried to buy one online last week pero, todo afuera…
BEN: I’ll double check but the calendars are usually limited. She’s doing another project with Christine soon. I’ll let you know.
DAD: Gracias amigo.
BEN: Are you guys mahjong players yet?
DAD: Hey how’d you know? The expats here love it. There’s a facebook page for home games. We’ve been grinding youtube tutorials lately.
BEN: That’s a good idea. So Sue and Patrice started a league in Portsmouth few months back. And now mom’s top of the leaderboard apparently. She was just here last week looking for a game.
DAD: Fantastico! What a phenom!
BEN: Oh and by the way there’s a bigger vote coming up on the 25 this month. So save that date.
DAD: Oh, all right. What we up to this time?
th
of BEN: Can’t say yet.
DAD: Not even to one of your biggest maniacs?
BEN: You’ll see soon enough.
DAD: Another milestone?
BEN: I’ll never tell.
DAD: Is it the film festival??
Ding!!!!!!!!
DAD: Audrey who is it?
AUDREY: Dave it’s the fruit man. Come on!
DAD: El frutero esta aqui! Nos vemos pronto muchacho?
BEN: No hay problema… Disfruta tu fruta!
DAD: Gracias, gracias…
BEN: Andele, Andele!
Click.
ROBOT: This. Phone. Call. Is. No. Longer. Being. Recorded. Good. Bye. Fade to black. This right here is part of the game D. And without the game, this whole family would be down in the f**kin’ terrace livin’ off scraps. Shit we probably wouldn’t even be a family. Start over huh? How the f**k you gone start over without your peoples? Without your own child even? You ain’t got family in this world… what the hell you got?(W)
T H E
M O V I E
M A N I A C
R O A D M A P
S1: Weekly Podcasts ($1000)
S2: Monthly Screenings ($2500)
S3: Rent The Studio / Office ($5000)
S4: Hire Production Assistant ($10000)
S5: Start Film Festival Fees Fund ($15000)
S6: Rent Bigger Studio / Clubhouse ($20000)
S7: Build a Movie Maniacs Meetup App ($35000)
S8: Begin Quarterly Filmmaker Workshop ($50000)
S9: Launch The Movie Maniacs Film Festival ($75000)
S10: Grand-Opening of Cinema de Maniaques ($100000)
The Movie Maniacs of New York™ is a non-profit project Owned by The Movie Maniacs of New York™ and Operated by The Schopick Company, LTD
www.schopickcompany.com
Brooklyn, New York EST.02192019
Footnotes:
(a)Genius Season 01, 2016
(a)Flight of The Conchords, 2008
(b)Clockwork Orange, 1972
©Don’t Say A Word, 2001
(d)Lion King, 1994
(e)Harvest, 1972
(f)Man Bites Dog, 1992
(g)Rolling Thunder Review, 2019
(h)The Mastery of Love, 2015
(i)Collateral, 2001
(j)Mr. Robot, 2017
(k)Office Space, 1999
(l)Mr. Robot, 2018
(m)Zoolander, 2001
(n)Eternal Sunshine, 2004
(o)The Favourite, 2018
(p)Francis Ford Coppola, 1979
(q)Everybody Loves Raymond* 2016
(r)Birds of Passage, 2019
(s)Assassination of Gianna Versace, 2018
(t)Genius Season 1: Einstein, 2017
(u)Godfather Part 2* 1974
(v)The Dark Knight, 2008
(w)A Christmas Story, 1983
(x)Billy Madison, 1995
(y)Leonard Cohen & Mr. Robot, 2018
(z)Good Will Hunting, 1997
(A)Escape From Dannemora, 2019
(B)Dude where’s my car? 2000
©The Wire, 2002
(D)The Sandlot, 1993
(E)Everything Is Illuminated, 2005
(F)Marty Scorsays, 1996
(G)Dumb & Dumber, 1994
(H)Red Dragon, 2002
(I)Angels in The Outfield, 1994
(K)Dr. Strangelove,1964
